Cost-Benefit of Life

“The purpose of morality is to teach you, not to suffer and die, but to enjoy yourself and live.”

— Ayn Rand

This past weekend, as I’m sitting in my hotel room in Hong Kong, I get a ping on Facebook. It’s a private message via Facebook Messenger from someone I’ve known for more than 10 years. This individual and I have never really been friends, but we’ve been acquaintances and went to high-school and university together. 

The message reads as follows:

"Your words are inspiring. I dream of seeing the world one day. Recently I’ve been thinking I need to make a major life change but I don’t have as much courage as you."

To be honest, this message took me by surprise. For those who know me really well know that I am not the most open person in the world. I hold my emotions and feelings close to me. And that comes off as not very social. It was much worse when I was growing up. When I moved to the United States from the Middle East, I was shy. I never really talked to people and kept to myself. On the other hand, the person who sent me this message was the complete opposite - she was a social butterfly.

And the reason her message to me this weekend is surprising is because so many people keep pursuing a life that is well accepted by society but also completely detrimental to personal well being. 

Don’t like your job? Quit. Don’t like your career? Find a new one. Dislike the person you’re with? There are 7 billion others in the world. Don’t like your friends? Find new ones. Don’t feel that your family is supportive enough? Move out. Don’t like the winter? Move to a beach. Want to travel the world? Buy a plane ticket. 

There are always excuses to NOT pursue something (too old, too young, too poor, too many responsibilities, etc.) But your only responsibility is to yourself. 

Here’s my only question to anyone dealing with any of this dilemma - if you lived like this for the rest of your life, would you be happy? If so, don’t change a thing. If you took more than a second to answer that, go find your passion. 

Yes, it’s scary. It’s supposed to be. When is the last time something good happened because you were comfortable and protected in your little shell? 

Life is short. Live it. 

Don't Follow Your Dreams

“Please do make your decisions in life and feel confident that they are right. However, if fate is involved, feel just as confident even if they aren’t.
”

— C. Elizabeth, Absolute Obsession

As part of my job, I see a lot of ideas come through my desk. A few of them, I get excited about and decide to pursue. Many of them are not the right fit. However, the common trend between these ideas are the people - the startup entrepreneurs. They range from 18 to 60. Their eyes are glowing and they are passionate. They want it. Who knows what it is, but it is clearly important. 

Despite most of my writing that focuses on the positive aspects of startup life, this post is not about the good things. It's about the struggle. Despite the glow in entrepreneur's eyes and the burning desire to succeed, what goes on in the background is crazy and insane. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies. 

These are people who have asked for money from their parents, friends and family. Yet, they have nothing to show for it. 

These are people who have closed out their savings accounts and their paycheck is still $0. 

These are people who have gone from living in a nice apartment to under their desk. 

These are people who have gone into irrecoverable debt and sometimes into bankruptcy. 

These are people who have lost family and friends because the time commitment to building this thing - which may or may not succeed - is inhuman. 

These are people who have sacrificed the best  part of their lives to focus on a dream. 

And that's what is so scary about being a founder. Dreams do come true. Only if you want them to. And the reason I say "these people" is because I have been there. And it was terrifying. It still is terrifying. It keeps me up at night. It scares the living crap out of me. 

But you know what? I am fucking happy. Every single day. Every decision I make is mine. Every word I write is calculated. Every person that has survived this shitstorm with me is family. And that to me is success. 

The world will try to mold you into something that aspirational people disagree with. Every day. Every single minute. It starts off with your GPA, then your SAT scores, then your internship and then your first job. And you realize, during this process, you hate it all. It's not what you thought your life would be. And it sure as hell doesn't make you happy. 

So, here's my advise: don't follow your dreams. It's fucking hard. Instead, follow your heart. It already knows what you can't admit.  

The Pursuit

As I’m writing this, I’ve spent the past 24 hours between airports on both coasts of the United States and en-route to Bermuda for some much needed thawing out. 

Most people dislike the thought of traveling for long hours. I, on the other hand, love it. 

I love flying from California to New York overnight and arriving at my office in time for the first meeting of the day. And despite all my whining, I love working hard and long hours to ensure that the things that we do mean something to someone. It doesn’t matter if all I’m doing is helping someone find a cheap flight or planning a social get together or building out applications for clients. 

And the reason it doesn’t matter is because I care. 

Over the past 3 years, I’ve slowly called it quits on my previous life. No more corporate credit cards. No more counting paid vacation days. No more people, clients and projects that were just a way to the end (aka: bottle service). 

It’s been scary along the way. But, it’s been rewarding beyond my wildest expectations. Because today I’m fueled by the the very core of things I care about: good people with a side of crazy. 

I stress every single day about finances. I stress about what might happen if all of this goes away. And I’m terrified beyond belief if the people I care about the most stop believing in the future. Because if there is one thing I’ve learned is this - the people closest to you never let you quit. They inspire you to work harder than you ever have before. They inspire you to go beyond your wildest threshold.  

And that’s what makes this incredibly fun. 

There isn’t enough money in the world for me to work an all-nighter for someone else. Or to even live a life where every single day is guaranteed. But that’s what makes this worth it. It’s all about being crazy enough to believe that things that you care about will care about you when it matters the most. 

To those on the edge - don’t fret. Do it. Perhaps one small step. Perhaps a huge leap. Either way, the freedom is exhilarating. 

Shorter Weekends. Longer Workdays

I want weekends to be shorter. I want workdays to be longer.

As I've transitioned from a 9-5 job to building companies, I get excited about Monday mornings. I get excited about meetings. I get excited about doing things that in my previous life would have taken an act of God to accomplish. 

In the past 2 weeks, we've accomplished the following:

• Locked one of PaLaCart's bigger financing deals
• Landed one of the biggest meetings a retail startup could ever hope for and
• Closed on one of the most visible production deals 

These things, under any other circumstances, would have taken months. Setup the meeting, go through the pleasantries, explore potential options and then navigate the mountains of hierarchy to get to the final agreement. 

At startups and at senior executive levels, these things are natural. And that's what makes it really exciting when you're doing what you love with people that you genuinely care about. 

It's exciting. It's fun. It's thrilling. And for that, it makes worktime seem like playtime. And weekends like unemployment. 

Regardless of the outcome, I've realized that working on what you love is the absolute # 1 priority. Life is too short to work 9-5 or heck, even one second on stuff that doesn't matter to you. 

Armchair Advisors

PaLaCart is proudly based in New York. Its team, customers and investors are global and as such there are plenty of meetings in various parts of the world. 

During my travels, whether it is for fundraising or sales, I’ve had the pleasure of meeting a lot of incredibly smart people - and all of them envious for a number of different reasons about “startup life.”

The reason I put startup life in quotes and add the word envious in the prior statement is because if you ask any entrepreneur, startup life for most outsiders is looked upon as:

1. Globe trotting
2. Flexible hours
3. Freedom

Where as, here is how a startup founder looks at those things:

1. Globe trotting: spending a considerable amount of time away from friends and family making sure you are closing deals so that you can run your next payroll.
2. Flexible hours: not because it’s false, but because flexible hours means working when the rest of the world is sleeping. And hustling when the rest of the world is working. 
3. Freedom: this one a misnomer. As a start-up founder, your freedom relies on 2 things - the ability to keeping going through hell or the calling it quits. 

Lately, with booming success of technology companies and multi-billion dollar exits, it is difficult to not look at this industry with rose colored glasses. Some days, being an entrepreneur is the best thing in the world. Other days, everything works against you. 

However, these successes have also generated armchair investors and advisors. People who have tons of feedback without the experience, knowledge or risk. 

Some of the feedback I’ve been hearing from the sidelines:

• Burn is too high
• Burn is too low
• Design is too forward
• Design is dated
• Technology is too easy to duplicate
• Technology is extremely powerful

And the issue isn’t about positive vs. negative feedback. It’s about feedback without context. 

A few weeks ago, I was seeking advice from people who have been in the tech start-up space. After scouring AngelList, I came across Joe Caruso. He spent nearly an hour with me on the phone - simply asking questions and clarifying items in our investment deck. And that feedback - despite being an hour long is incredibly valuable. Joe is a person who is experienced, knows the market and more importantly - gets to know you and your business. 

Positivity, feedback and criticism are all incredibly valuable for entrepreneurs. They thrive and survive on this information. 

These things define the future of a startup and hence why founders and entrepreneurs are hesitant in accepting feedback from someone they don’t trust - because unless you know the entire story, a decision based on incomplete background and experience will more likely than not, result in disaster. And worst of all - if you ask for a consulting fee and a retainer just to show up to a startup meeting, you will be ignored by any serious entrepreneur.